Explaining your child’s autism diagnosis and ABA therapy journey to extended family members isn’t always easy. While close relatives often want to support you, they may not fully understand what ABA therapy is, why it’s necessary, or how they can be helpful.
At Alight Behavioral, we often hear from parents who feel unsure about how to approach these conversations. Some worry about judgment, others about misinformation, and many simply don’t know where to start. The good news is: with a little preparation and a compassionate approach, these discussions can become opportunities to build understanding and strengthen your support network.
Here’s how to talk to extended family members about your child’s ABA therapy in a way that feels respectful, informative, and empowering.
Start With the Basics: What Is ABA Therapy?
Many people outside the autism community have never heard of Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) therapy, or they may only know bits and pieces from things they’ve read or heard. It helps to begin with a simple explanation that puts the focus on your child’s growth and needs.
You might say something like:
“ABA therapy is a type of behavioral therapy that helps [Child’s Name] learn new skills, communicate more effectively, and reduce challenging behaviors. It’s based on research and is personalized to fit their unique needs.”
Avoid getting too technical unless the family member asks for more detail. The goal here is to help them understand that ABA therapy is a supportive, positive tool that’s helping your child reach their potential.
Address Common Misconceptions
Sometimes, extended family members may raise concerns about whether ABA therapy is too intense, too structured, or unnecessary. They may wonder why your child needs therapy at all or question whether it’s really effective.
If this happens, remember that most of the time, these comments come from a place of unfamiliarity—not judgment.
You can calmly respond with something like:
“I understand it may seem intense, but ABA is very child-centered. It’s all about helping [Child’s Name] learn through positive reinforcement, play, and everyday routines. We’ve already seen progress, and it’s made a big difference for us at home.”
When needed, correct misconceptions with kindness, and don’t feel obligated to defend every detail. It’s okay to say, “We’ve chosen this path because it works for our family.”
Share What ABA Looks Like in Everyday Life
One of the most effective ways to help others understand your child’s therapy is to give real-life examples of how it helps. Instead of talking in generalities, describe how ABA therapy supports your child in practical terms.
For example:
“Before ABA, it was hard for [Child’s Name] to transition between activities without getting upset. Now, the therapist has helped them learn how to use a timer and visual schedule, and transitions are much smoother.”
Or:
“We’ve been working on communication, and [Child’s Name] has learned how to ask for things instead of getting frustrated. It’s made such a difference in our day-to-day routine.”
When family members hear specific, positive outcomes, they’re more likely to appreciate how meaningful this therapy is for your child—and for you.
Let Them Know How They Can Support You
Extended family often wants to help but may not know how. Once they understand what ABA therapy involves, give them some ideas for how they can be part of the support system.
You could say:
“One of the things that helps most is consistency. If you’re ever babysitting or spending time with [Child’s Name], we can show you some of the strategies we use so everything feels familiar.”
Or:
“Just being patient and encouraging when [Child’s Name] is working on a skill is so helpful. It means a lot when you cheer them on.”
By inviting family into the process in small, manageable ways, you can foster collaboration and help your child feel supported across different environments.
Set Boundaries If Needed
While many family members will be receptive and supportive, not everyone will respond as you hope. If someone is dismissive, overly critical, or refuses to respect your choices, it’s okay to set boundaries around what you share and how much involvement they have.
You can say:
“We’ve made this decision based on what’s best for [Child’s Name]. I’d love your support, but I also understand if you need time to learn more about it.”
Protecting your child’s emotional and developmental well-being comes first. You don’t owe anyone a detailed explanation if they’re unwilling to listen with empathy.
Keep the Conversation Going
Talking about ABA therapy with extended family doesn’t have to be a one-time discussion. As your child grows and progresses, their needs will evolve—and so can your conversations. Share updates, celebrate milestones, and keep family members informed when appropriate.
If a grandparent or aunt becomes especially interested, consider inviting them to a parent training session or sharing a short video or article about ABA. At Alight Behavioral, we encourage family-wide learning and are always happy to provide educational resources to support those close to you.
You Don’t Have to Navigate This Alone
Talking to extended family about your child’s ABA therapy can be challenging, but you don’t have to do it alone. At Alight Behavioral, we not only provide in-home ABA therapy—we also support families through every aspect of the journey, including how to build a strong support system beyond the therapy sessions.
If you’re in Minnesota or North Carolina and looking for compassionate, expert-led in-home ABA therapy, we’re here to help. From the first conversation to long-term care, our team walks alongside your family with personalized treatment plans, parent training, and resources designed to empower you—and your extended family too.
Contact Alight Behavioral today to learn more about how we can help your child thrive and how we support the entire family along the way.
